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Overly Controlling People are controlled by fear

Over the past two years I have ministered to thousands of people around the world who all have struggled with similar issues.  They have grown up with the lack of unconditional love from a parent (usually a father) which affects them in dramatic ways for a lifetime.  Why does the lack of love from one’s parents have such a huge impact on a child and their relationships throughout their life? What is the driving force that causes them to have limited peace in their lives?  What causes them to have significant strife in their lives that counseling never seems to address?

When a young child grows up with a father (or mother) who is not there for them emotionally, the child will hear the enemy whisper to them that they are not wanted.  They will feel rejected.  A spirit of rejection then continues to whisper to them in their minds causing them to believe that they cannot trust their parent (and later is transferred to their spouse and others in their lives so they do not trust anyone, but themselves). If a parent treats their child with more harsher treatment, such as critical words, manipulative control, yelling or otherwise abusive behavior, then the fear and pain and lack of trust is even stronger in the child.  This creates a strong spirit of fear to take hold inside the child.

As the child grows up, they continue to hear the voice of the enemy inside their heads, causing them to make most of their decisions based in fear.  They do not trust others to have their best interests at heart (and many that they draw to in life may indeed not have their best interests at heart which perpetuates their beliefs from childhood).  Their voice inside their head tells them to not trust their husband or wife, or manager at work, or pastor or leader at church.  It drives them out of fear to control other people throughout their lives, because they cannot trust them.

They control their spouses by making them do what they want to do.  Decisions like where to eat, what to do with their spare time, what to purchase or not purchase, where to go to church, what activities to pursue, how to parent their children, and all of their decisions are based in fear.  They are often married to a person that is more laid back and free flowing.  They like these types of people because they will normally give in and allow them to make most of the decisions in life.  Unfortunately their relationships will struggle with true intimacy because the person that continues to give in on so many decisions will feel like a puppet and lose their identity of making any decisions.  The marriage begins to break down over time and usually the person being controlled feels the need to separate in order to not suffocate.  Once the person separates, the person who feels compelled to control is no longer able to control them, and often times chooses to divorce them.  Sometimes the person who is being controlled files for divorce, even though they don’t want to because they loved their spouse.

So how does one get freed from feeling compelled to control their spouse and other people in life?  Many go to counselors or pastors but very few are trained on how to address the spiritual problem by dealing effectively with the underlying spirits that are controlling the person’s thoughts.  They simply talk to them, head to head, instead of getting Holy Spirit insight.  Sometimes they may even tell the person that they have a chemical imbalance or some other psychological explanation for it and then prescribe some kind of medication that never addresses the root issue. Then the person must deal with side effects that causes them more problems as their are spirits of pharmakeya in the stronger medications.

So what is the answer?  What I have seen over the past two years and thousands of ministry sessions in my life as truly helping a person to get freed once and for all, is to take their spiritual authority over themselves and commanding the enemy spirits that are driving them to feel compelled to control other people to be gone.  Just like Jesus said in Mark 16:17 “And these signs will follow those who believe: In My name they will cast out demons….” I have done it multiple times, and help thousands of others take their own authority over their own lives and instantly they feel at peace, no longer hearing the voice of the enemy in such a strong and tormenting way.  It is truly a life-changing experience.

Once the spirits are commanded to go (for example the Jezebel spirit which causes people to behave very controlling and manipulatively), then the person lives life with not hearing the enemy in such a strong way anymore.  Sure the enemy will still try to whisper to them and they must continue to renew their mind in the truth of the Word, but they do not hear the enemy nearly as strongly, feel an immediate peace all over them, and can sleep through the night.  They often get healed from various physical infirmities and no longer cause strife in their relationships. People notice the dramatic change in their lives as they become a new person in Christ.  Then it is just a process of continuing to grow in walking out every day in their full authority in Christ.

Being freed from the Jezebel spirit has so dramatically changed thousands of lives around the world that the results are evident.  You can read about the many positive results people are having around the world on my Facebook ministry page at www.facebook.com/restoredtofreedom by clicking on Reviews.  There is no substitute for the power of taking one’s authority in Christ over their lives and effectively commanding the enemy spirits to be gone forever, allowing them to live in peace, love and joy.  People who no longer feel the desire to control another person feels so much freedom for the first time.  And the loved ones who are their spouses or children or siblings, are eternally grateful for being able to live in peace and feel loved instead of controlled.   My book Restored to Freedom (Amazon) has helped thousands to gain total freedom over spirits that cause them to control other people and sabotage their relationships.  It is truly a beautiful thing.

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